Are you feeling lonely during your spiritual awakening process? You’re not alone! I also went through this phase myself, and in this episode I wish to explain why this happens and what to do about it. How do you overcome loneliness when you’re waking up?
If you listen to the fake gurus, they will tell you that during spiritual awakening, you will feel this tremendous and beautiful connection to the universe and every living being in it. Yes, you will indeed feel this when you become enlightened, but it couldn’t be further from the truth when you’re just awakening.
What they don’t tell you is that spiritual awakening is a destructive process, especially in the beginning. It’s a general detachment from your old life and thinking patterns, and your relationships are no exceptions either. Feeling lonely during awakening is not the exception but the rule.
These inauthentic and superficial teachers make you believe that you’re supposed to feel connected, when in fact you’re feeling as disconnected as never before. It’s not your fault, they simply don’t know what they’re speaking about, or they want to make it seem easier than it really is. I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you if you’re going through this right now.
As you’re plugging out of the matrix, you are losing almost everything and everyone around you, including your relatives, friends and maybe even your partner. Oftentimes you physically remain alone, you feel as if everybody left you.
Other times, it’s not about the physical but the psychological separation. Even though your old friends and family members remain in your life, something gets irreversibly broken in your connection with them. Your whole outlook changes with the snap of a finger, and suddenly everybody around you seems superficial and egoistic.
Those long talks you had in the past now seem shallow and unfulfilling. You feel as if everybody was doing only small talk, and avoids the real issues. You want to talk about the hard questions of life, and not about politics or the weather. You are asking the real questions, but nobody seems to have an answer.
So, you turn to spiritual books, videos and teachers to quench your existential thirst. You glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel, and you’re excited to share every new revelation, realization and nugget of wisdom with the people around you. You feel like Moses returning from the hill with the 10 commandments in his hands.
However, nobody is interested in your so-called truths. They are still living their unconscious, ego-driven, closed-minded lives, and they couldn’t care less about your amazing discoveries. Some may think you’ve gone crazy, took drugs or joined a cult. At most, they’ll be worried for you and want to get back the good old you.
You’re surprised by their rejection, because you only want good for them from the bottom of your heart. Whether you become angry at them or not, this makes you even more disconnected from the people around you. You feel as if nobody understood you, and in a way, this is true.
But I understand you, I know what you’re going through and I can connect to you. Don’t blame others, don’t be angry at them, and don’t feel sorry for them either. Instead, be grateful that you are now changing, transforming, awakening. This is the time to focus on yourself, to turn inwards.
Basically every great spiritual teacher went through a phase of isolation early on on their own journeys. Jesus went into the desert for 40 days. Muhammad periodically retreated into a cave. Buddha left his family and sought enlightenment in solitude for 6 years before it happened.
I’m not saying that you should lock yourself up in a cave and become a hermit. But in one form or another, you will inevitably experience disconnection, isolation and solitude. But you should always remember, that this is part of the process, and it’s actually a good sign. You are making progress, so embrace the aloneness!
Note that I didn’t say loneliness. Loneliness and aloneness are two entirely different things, and while the former is full of suffering, the latter can be full of joy. To understand the true difference between the two, you can watch my video titled “How to deal with loneliness”.
Being alone is necessary for self-discovery. The world is a dream, a distraction, a distortion of reality. If you’re constantly looking outwards, you’ll never find yourself. What you need now is a little space just for yourself, where you can peacefully close your eyes, and discover your depths, the glowing inner light in the darkness.
Life is the flight of the alone to the Alone. Everybody is running away from the inner aloneness, trying to distract himself with the facade of superficial relations. You can relate to someone as much as you want, but the reality is that you are always essentially and existentially alone whatever you do.
The ego is afraid of aloneness, because it can only exist in relation to others, without attention it dies. This ego-driven fear, desire, and longing is what you experience when you feel lonely. But to kill your ego, you need exactly this: to take a good look at it in solitude, and realize that it’s just a fantasy.
That’s the moment when you realize that aloneness is exactly who you are, and what you’ve been searching all along was this absolute, existential, overwhelming aloneness. But this kind of aloneness is not negative, it’s not lonely. You become connected to the entire universe, you become totally one with it. Total aloneness is total connectedness from a different perspective.
So, although you can’t go back to your old life, a totally new one is waiting for you, you just need to have faith and patience. Although you can seek help and guidance, this is a path you ultimately have to take alone. Don’t rush to find somebody who will understand you, understand yourself first. Don’t be in a hurry to find a new spiritual tribe, develop your inner strenght and learn to enjoy your own company first.
Even if you’re feeling utterly lonely right now, know that this too shall pass. It’s just a temporary phase during the spiritual awakening process, and if you resist it, you’re only making it longer than necessary. And finally, mark my words: How can you be lonely, when you’re the one and only?
In this free report, I’ll reveal my number one secret to spiritual enlightenment that almost nobody else speaks about. Download it now below, to find out what it is! I can guarantee you, you’ll be surprised!