Going Crazy During Spiritual Awakening

By definition, crazy means abnormal. Being normal is a sickness, it’s a disease spread by society. When others label you weird or crazy, be happy because it’s a good sign. It means that you are starting to find your individuality, starting to separate from the flock, starting to unplug from the matrix.

Just think about it: what separates the average person from a madman? The crazies are always crazy in a unique way, but you can only be average in one way. The whole world is a mental asylum, where everybody is crazy in the same way, so nobody notices it. Craziness has become the norm, so ironically, in the very same moment when you come to your senses, they label you abnormal.

Your ego is falling apart, your mental cage is becoming more spacious. Your strong identification with form loosens up, and the formerly solid ground becomes shaky under your feet. When you disconnect yourself from the form, you also distance yourself from the norm.

Life is like a rat race, but we can’t see this when we’re in it. We are surrounded by the walls of the maze from every direction, we are short-sighted. In the race for survival, there’s no time to look around or to wonder what may lie behind the wall. We are focused on getting the next promotion, on buying the new gadget, on grabbing the next piece of cheese, overtaking the other rat next to us.

But during a spiritual awakening, our consciousness expands so much, that we are able to transcend the whole rat race altogether, and take a good look on the maze from above. From up there, we can easily grasp the absurdity, insanity and futility of the life we used to live up until now, the same life others around us are still living.

From here, we can see all the rats running around frantically, blindly and senselessly, as if they were on drugs. They don’t know where they came from, they don’t know where they’re going, and they don’t even know why they’re running. They’re just running around in circles, and they don’t even realize it, they think they’re actually getting somewhere, but from a bigger perspective, they are stuck in one place.

They are chasing some elusive thing they can’t even define, and they can never reach it. They will never be able to reach it if they stay inside the maze, and now you can see this. Now you can see that however successful you become in the rat race, whereever you turn inside the maze, you will always end up in a dead-end. The only way is to trancend the maze altogether, to live life on a totally different dimension.

Yes, it’s crazy that people waste their time collecting money, when they know they can’t take it with them to the grave. Yes, it’s crazy that they only live for survival when they know that they will die anyway. Yes, it’s totally crazy that they are destroying the very planet that’s giving them life. The average person is living a crazy life, but the denial of death shields him from noticing this. In fact, he denies death exactly by collecting money, focusing on survival and damaging the environment.

During spiritual awakening, you realize how crazy the world really is, but you also realize something even more important: that you are not an exception. As a so-called normal person, you’ve always been leading a crazy life, you simply didn’t notice it. So it’s not that now you suddenly turned crazy, you are simply awakening to the fact. And it’s good, because otherwise you would never be able to change.

But don’t misunderstand me! I’m not saying that this higher dimension is somewhere up in the heavens. Spiritual awakening is not about transcending the material world, it’s about realizing its spiritual nature. I’m not saying that now you should start blindly believing every crazy idea you read on the internet. Spiritual awakening is not about believing in new things, it’s about doubting your old beliefs.

I remember how crazy I felt sometimes during my spiritual awakening. I was like a mad scientist, reading everything I could put my hands on, trying to find the hidden connections between things, coming up with crazy theories about life. I became obsessed with trying to find the truth, trying to figure out what was happening to me.

Sometimes I felt that I made a huge discovery, that I arrived to a great realization, that now I understand everything totally with great clarity. At other times though, I felt just the opposite: that I don’t really understand anything, that I’m totally confused, that all I ever have is doubt with no certainty.

Maybe you are also in a similar situation right now. Do you remember what I said in the beginning: that you’re seeing life from above, from a higher perspective? Well, up there in the sky, the view is not always so clear. Oftentimes a cloud comes and envelops you totally, and this is when you become confused and lost.

This thick, grey and depressing fog causes literal brain fog: confusion, forgetfulness, and a lack of focus and mental clarity. Many times this fog disappears on its own, and when it does, you win back the state of total clarity. But there’s nothing between these two extreme states when you’re going through a spiritual awakening, so in fact it may seem like you’re going crazy, but you’re simply on another dimension.

These sudden shifts between the extremities is typical of all areas of life as you’re awakening. One moment you feel ecstatic and overwhelmed with bliss, the next moment you fall into a deep depression. One moment you feel like everything makes sense, the next moment you feel that life is meaningless. One moment you feel that you’re becoming wiser, the next moment you think you’re going insane.

Well, in a sense you are going insane, because you’re literally falling out of your mind. When you do, this crazy phase of awakening will end, and you’ll find true peace of mind, wisdom and clarity. You can only find yourself by losing your mind, because your true self is beyond thoughts. So, be a little crazy!

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Memento Mori!